dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
