I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Congratulations! We have a period
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