I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
