Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
