I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
