yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize
