In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
