It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
