i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
