You work out of a Hotel?
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Randomize
