I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
