I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize