No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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