what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
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