So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
