So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
sex in a hospital.. check
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
