she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I lost the right to judge tonight
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
