She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Randomize
