pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
