I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
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