Say something about gay babies.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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