Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
