Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
he high fived his dick after we had sex
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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