Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
