no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Randomize
