Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
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