We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Randomize