Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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