It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
