She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
