I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Randomize
