Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Randomize
