so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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