Apparently you make a good broom.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
