let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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