she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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