Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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