Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
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