Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
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