dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Why did my mother make you get naked?
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