Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize
