We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize