i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Randomize
