I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Randomize