this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
