if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
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