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She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Randomize