Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
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