Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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