C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Randomize