Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I think a kid would responsible me up
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize